i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
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It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
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How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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