their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
