I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
one two three fourrrrnication!
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
