Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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