why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize