Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
im calling her cock vulture from now on
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
