final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
