How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize