I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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