I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I will be naked everywhere
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
