i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize