Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize