The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
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