You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize