Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
