So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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