I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
