worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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