So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I have fence marks all over my body
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
