It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
