Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
