i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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