Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
