found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
