i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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