i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize