He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
