I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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