I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize