The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
