Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(513): View more from Ohio

Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?

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(269): View more from Michigan

I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.

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(207): View more from Maine

guess who has a date tonight

(401): View more from Rhode Island

look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed

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(720): View more from Colorado

just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.

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(734): View more from Michigan

Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?

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(505): View more from New Mexico

As shirtless as possible

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(707): View more from California

Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.

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(210): View more from Texas

We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations

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(636): View more from Missouri

It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?

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