The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
