Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I'm both gender and math confused
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
