you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
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We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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