you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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