you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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