The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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