Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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