tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Randomize
