ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
