He asked to "fluff my boner.."
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize