I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
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