Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
