In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
