How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize