Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
He did a backflip because drugs
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize