Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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