did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Randomize