Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
