So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
