Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
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